Parent-Teen Engagement Strategies
As your teen participates in PLEDGE at school, you may find it helpful to continue the conversation at home.
Talking with teens about firearm safety and mental health can build trust, encourage open communication, and support safer decision-making.
PLEDGE encourages parents and caregivers to keep these discussions going beyond the classroom.
Thoughtful Approaches to Sensitive Conversations with Children
Talking about firearms with kids can feel hard. Here are some helpful tips for having caring and calm conversations:
Speak in a supportive and respectful way
Ask open-ended questions to allow your child to share their feelings and experiences
Let your child know that their feelings and questions are normal
Focus on finding solutions instead of placing blame
Use “what if” questions to help them think through real-life situations without feeling scared or ashamed
Common Student Questions and How a Parent/Guardian May Respond
What if I see a firearm at a friend’s house?
Remain calm. Do not touch it and tell your friend also not to touch it. Leave the area and tell a trusted adult immediately. Inform your parent or guardian about what happened as well.
Possible parent response: “I’m really glad you asked about this. If you ever see a firearm at a friend’s house, here’s what you should do: Stop right away. Don’t touch it. Tell your friend not to touch it. Then leave the room and go find an adult you trust. If anything like this ever happens, you won’t be in trouble. You’re doing the right thing by telling an adult.”
What if my friend shows me a firearm?
Remain calm. Do not touch it and tell your friend also not to touch it. Leave the area and tell a trusted adult immediately. Inform your parent or guardian about what happened as well.
Possible parent response: “If a friend ever shows you a firearm, here’s exactly what I want you to do: Stay calm, don’t touch it, and ask your friend not to touch it either. Then leave the room right away and tell a trusted adult. Guns are not safe to handle, even if someone thinks it’s not loaded or says it’s okay. You won’t be in trouble for walking away or telling an adult — you’re being smart and safe.”
What if I’m handed a firearm?
Do not touch it - even if it’s handed to you, don’t take it or hold it. Say firmly, “I don’t want to touch that.” Step away immediately. Leave the area if you can and tell a trusted adult right away. Inform your parent or guardian about what happened as well.
Possible parent response: “If anyone ever hands you a firearm, or tries to, do not take it. Say, ‘I don’t want to touch that,’ and move away immediately. Then find a trusted adult and tell them what happened right away. Guns are never safe to handle unless you're trained, and even then, only in the right setting. Always remember, you won’t be in trouble. What matters most is keeping yourself and others safe. I’m always proud of you for making smart, safe choices, and you can always come talk to me.”
Who can I talk to if I feel nervous or afraid about something?
A trusted adult, friend, teacher. Remember that you are never alone and there are always people who care and want to help you.
Possible parent response: “If you ever feel nervous, scared, or unsure about anything, you can always talk to me. I’m here to help you, listen to you, and make sure you're safe. And if for any reason you don’t feel comfortable talking to me right away, it’s okay to go to another trusted adult, like a teacher, a neighbor, or coach. You’re never alone, and you’ll never be in trouble for sharing how you feel.”
How do I help someone who’s depressed?
Be kind and supportive, listen without judging, encourage them to talk to an adult, tell a trusted adult yourself, know it’s not your job to fix it – You can support your friend, but adults need to help them too. Take care of yourself too and know that whatever happens with your friend, it is not your fault.
Possible parent response: “If someone you know seems really sad, or says they’re depressed, it’s important to be kind and let them know they’re not alone. But remember you don’t have to fix it by yourself. The best thing you can do is to tell a trusted adult, like me, a teacher, or a school counselor, so they can get the help they need. You’re being a good friend by caring, and you can always talk to me if you’re not sure what to do or if you're feeling overwhelmed too. We’ll figure it out together.”
Suggested Conversation Starters for Parents to Ask Their Child
What did you learn about firearm safety in school today?
What part of the PLEDGE curriculum stood out to you most?
Who are trusted adults in your life that you feel you can always turn to in difficult situations?
How can we make our home safer?
What are ways you can help your friends stay safe?
Let’s talk about what makes you feel unsafe.
Are you feeling safe at _________?
What are some things we, as a family, can do to stay safe in different situations?
What do you think adults sometimes misunderstand about safety for teens?
Are there situations at school, with friends, at home, or online that feel stressful or unsafe right now?